An episode from my life came up in a comment the other day. It may sound trivial but it made a huge impression on me. I’ll do my best to describe it but it may be one of those things you had to be there to appreciate.
In 2005 I spent a few weeks with Shiva Rudra Bala Yogi. I had never met him before. He was staying in a house owned by devotees while on tour in the US. The devotees were friends of mine and I was hanging around and helping out a little bit. His attendant, who had accompanied him from India, told me that he was still getting used to Self-realization.
One day he and I were alone in the house and he decided to take a nap. He asked me to wake him at a certain time so he could go to an event. When I went to wake him, I found him sitting on his bed staring at the floor and shaking his head from side to side like somebody who finds it hard to believe what he or she is seeing or hearing. In a tone of amazement he said, “The mind just doesn’t go out anymore. It just doesn’t go out.” I couldn’t tell if he was talking to himself or to me — maybe the distinction was meaningless to him.
It was obvious to me that I was hearing a spontaneous authentic expression of what he was experiencing, and that he found it amazing. He wasn’t on stage, he wasn’t playing a role, and he was talking to himself as much as to me. I can’t convince you that my impression was accurate but if you had been there and experienced it for yourself, I think you would be certain of it.
That’s the end of the story but I’ll add that I spent another week or two with him under similar circumstances the following year. I got to know him well enough that I would be convinced that he’s Self-realized even if the event I just described had never happened.
Because I got to know him I became convinced that Self-realization — genuine enlightenment — is the permanent 24/7 loss of the ego. It is permanent 24/7 contentment and consciousness. Such a state really exists. It’s not a myth. The mind no longer goes out because there is no longer any ego whose motivations cause it to go out. This state is permanent. It doesn’t come and go. Anybody who thinks enlightenment is less than that hasn’t gotten to know a genuinely enlightened person, and isn’t really enlightened themselves. Anybody who tells you enlightenment is less than that isn’t talking about the real thing.
Thank you Freddie. I found this very helpful as always. I’ve been thinking about this a lot. Even yesterday I was discussing with you in my imagination whether a particular person’s enlightened or not 🙂 I guess they’re not, yet 🙂
I hope you’re very well ❤️
Hi Focus,
This morning as I wrote that I thought about you, remembering your last email, wondering about this exact same thing! I’m sorry I never wrote again as I promised. A day or two after I sent my last short email, suddenly and unexpectedly, my life got disrupted and I had to move back to New York from New Mexico. I’ve been back in NY now for a month but somehow I haven’t returned to my old activities. I’ll try to write again soon but this time I won’t promise. Much love to you my friend. I hope you’re well.
Dear Freddie,
Have you experienced permanent awakening
Rgds
Puneet
Bernadette Roberts did a great job at distinguishing between no ego and no self… www. Bernadetterobertsisnotmyguru. Com
Thank you Freddie,
I checked SRBY YouTube and saw this great one-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CwKo6TZHb_c
#2 on the list – still eyes. That’s all I’m saying (:
Thanks Laura. (Is it okay if I write your name here? If you say no I’ll delete it.) This reminds me of one of the first books on Yoga I read, Yoga: Immortality and Freedom by Mircea Eliade. People often say that the main ideas of yoga are union and stilling of the mind and, I hope, kaivalya (aloneness) but if I remember correctly, Eliade, the author of that book, emphasizes stillness and immobilization of the body not just the mind.
The thing I always notice when I listen to SRBY’s videos is a sort of musicality in his voice. The way he draws out certain words and seems to enjoy the sound of words. He used to talk that way a little bit when I knew him in 2005-06 but it’s more pronounced now. I think maybe he speaks that way because his mind “hears” his constant samadhi that way and imitates it.
SRBY’s voice is soothing but I don’t think it has to do with his samadhi. Have you heard J. Krishnamurti talk? (:
(Yeah, you can write Laura, no problem)
Being still is the gist of all spiritual teaching, don’t you think?
Yeah, I’ve heard Krishnamurti. I didn’t mean that SRBY’s voice was soothing, just that he sort of plays with the sound of words (drawing some of them out, mostly) like musicians play with notes.
Physical stillness — I’ve mainly followed Ramana’s instructions and I don’t think he ever mentions physical stillness. (Edit: He never mentions it in his three major written works but he does answer questions about it in Talks and other books of recorded dialogs.) On the contrary, he tells people that the body is irrelevant and that they should practice while the body engages in activities. But he himself immobilized his body! The day he realized, the first thing he did was lie on the floor, pretend he was dead, and immobilize both body and mind. Interesting that he didn’t tell other people to do the same thing.
If your comment about “gist” includes physical stillness, I agree that many traditions tell people to be still physically. Some traditions make a big deal out of this (Soto Zen, for example) but I just checked this with one of the new AIs (they are terrific for finding ideas in tens of thousands of books) and apparently in some traditions it’s it’s mentioned in just a word or two with little emphasis. Patanjali, for example, only says somewhere (2.46) that posture should be “steady.”
Patanjali’s main commentator, Vyasa, expands this a little, saying: “When the body is steady and comfortable, the mind can become steady. Uneasiness and movement in the body cause distractions and disturbances in the mind. By maintaining stillness, one can focus inwardly and reach deeper states of meditation and awareness.” (Re sutras 2.46 and 2.47.)
I think maybe physical stillness often happens automatically when people start meditating. When I started, I had a problem with holding my breath. Suddenly I’d get jerked out of meditation because I needed to breathe. I see questions about this on social media pretty often so it must be a common problem. I think what I must have been doing, really, was immobilizing my body in every way but I only noticed the breath because that was the only aspect of immobility that triggered a “brain alert” that stopped meditation.
Self inquiry is a helpful detour for the western mind but unfortunately it was very much misunderstood. Ramana suggested self inquiry instead of silence (for those who find it difficult) although they are one and the same. How? When we sincerely investigate or really want to know who I am and follow thoughts back to their place of origin, there’s a subtle turning inside, the eyes are calm, the breathing is slow and you go into silent mode. I am present.
That’s It!
Who am I? Be still and know. That’s the being still that I referred to as the gist, not necessarily physical stillness.
(Apropos, maintaining poise is as good as sitting still or in lotus position. Vyasa’s comment is spot on – the body is steady and comfortable).
For me, being still is mainly about the eye movements. It’s not about freezing the eyes, they should be soft, relaxed and alive. When I’m really still and aware of it, thoughts disappear.
SRBY mentioned it when he said that when the eyeballs are moving “that gives a jerk to the mind”. Other teachers talked about the correlation between movement of eyeballs and movement of thoughts. Maybe they haven’t emphasized it enough, to avoid turning it into an eye thing, special eye exercises, as it would miss the point.
I remember once seeing a video of Gangaji, she said she tried to be still after Papaji told her to be still and she became stiff as a corpse, not inquisitively. Papaji laughed, she said, he didn’t mean it that way.
About holding the breath. SRBY in that video mentioned irregular breathing as one of the 4 hindrances to achieving Samadhi, according to Patanjali. “If you steadily watch the eyes, the breathing becomes smooth. it appears to be slow, as if non-existent, but you can’t stop oxygen flow”. I assume he meant that holding of the breath happens by itself, you don’t have to hold it.