Is this manonasha? Is it a different kind of manonasha from what we see in the Tony Parsons video? Is it preliminary to manonasha? Something else entirely?
The part that surprised me the most was that the “ego” doesn’t disappear at all. It doesn’t die, because it never lived. Rather, my false belief that a thought was myself vanished. It was this belief that the ego was me was what was causing all this tension and suffering, not the ego itself; the ego being simply whatever idea of self I had mind at the moment. There was no “ego being” that has been there all this time, rather, it was seen that I was making myself up every moment, albeit unconsciously. Now I see I can imagine I am whatever I feel like at any moment, though I never actually am it, though it IS an aspect of myself because it flows right from me, nowhere else.
That’s from What is Enlightenment and How Do You Find It? by iamquiet on Realization.org.
By the way — I’ve read every article published on Realization.org during the last 21 years and if I had to pick one and say it’s the best, it would be that one.
Further down in the article iamquiet says this:
Actions and decisions still take place but there is no “me” thought that is claiming ownership of any of it. This was one of the big surprises, that the outward appearance of a “somebody” with desires, hobbies, etc, going about their life continues. Responsibility for it is just let go of. It is only the imaginary construction of a “me” that believed he was controlling any of it, was responsible for, or was involved in any of it, disappears completely. Enlightenment is the total cessation of an “inward/outward” perception of oneself. The “inward”, the me who is narrating, desiring, speaking, etc, vanishes completely. Everything becomes both inward and outward simultaneously. It becomes one. But there is no person left to even acknowledge this, when non-duality arises, life just goes on, and there is no big “shift” or some great final experience. It is the end of the experience. It is the end of the thought-self that has been on the journey of enlightenment. This whole perspective of yourself as a “me” who has been self enquiring and “getting closer” etc just vanishes instantaneously. What’s left is pure shining awareness, a non-entity. This non-entity, living presence, simply IS. With no agenda, no interest, no needs, nothing to lose, nothing to gain. The whole great play of life simply arises and falls within this beautiful silent expanse of awareness, and this awareness is the real you.